The life and times that we are living in..

I often notice people around me, discussing their problems in life and their perceptions of happiness & sadness..people usually complain of having a miserable life..and perhaps the biggest contributing factor is lack of time..or no time to be precise..i often wonder what exactly has happened all of a sudden that we no longer have time for the very basic things in life..why dont we have the time to live a life..why dont we have the time to eat and sleep..why dont we have time for our near & dear ones..why dont we have the time to talk to people..why dont we have time for ourselves even..

Could be a variety of factors..

A) we have now, got busy owing to hectic work schedules, erratic sleep patterns, long travel to workplace

B) everybody has always been busy all these years; its just that now we have started talking about it all of a sudden

C) we have time but pretend to not have it

I think the first two seem to be the most probable ones! Often i have felt this myself & have heard others say it as well that when we were younger, life was better..we would realise how days would change into months..months into years..years into decades..now we suddenly seem to have lost count of everything..

Though there could be no denying the fact that, life today has actualy become a rat race where we are all running after something or the other..a better job..a better house..a better life..a better life partner! Wel ok probably the last part can be excluded! But the fact remains that never before has the pursuit of such goals been such a maddening exercise as it is now..may be we all have become ambitious..may be we are no longer easily satisfied with things around us..may be we all are just in the constant pursuit of things so as to beat the others who are also in the race..

The reasons could be many..the reasons could be varied for each person..but the fact of the matter is that life now is no longer about simple living and high thinking..its all about high living realy..though we may all want to go back to the wonderful childhood memories where all we wanted was to play with friends..when happiness was derived from the simple pleasures of life..still we would all come back to the rat race of the present day..people can be heard saying that they would love to live the life that our previous generations lived..but at the end of the day, those very people would very actively pursue their ambitions further..since that is the order of the day..its all very romantic to say that lets go back to the childhood days..lets learn to live with simplicity..but the truth is that we all have grown up, actively pursuing this rat race..ever since we were kids we have always wanted more..more marks, more gifts, more attention, more caring..its just that with time, our wants and desires have changed..but the core part of our life has remained the same..ie always being in the pursuit of things apart from those that we have already..

So is this good? being in the pursuit of things to an extent that we don't even realize how each day of our life is passing by? Is life all about passing each day as it comes? Isnt life supposed to be beautiful and meaningful? some would say that when u have serious responsibilities on your shoulders, then life cannot be a so called beautiful experience..it will very naturally be a question of existence..

Whereas some would say that yes their lives are beautiful..They are living it well..and are not just surviving..they are happy and healthy and enjoying every bit of what god has given them

I guess its a matter of perception really..sometimes we perceive our lives to be miserable when it is not..sometimes we see it as a never ending rat race when actually it is much more than that..i guess its a personal choice really as to how we tend to look at it..if we want, we can call ourselves happy even when we know that things are far from being happy with..if we want we can think that our lives are nothing but full of sadness when actually there is so much going about it

As it is being said that one's happiness is in one's own hands..so where do we go from here..do we all just get up in the morning and call ourselves happy? do we start living in an artificial world of always happy people? no..thats not the answer..

I guess the answer lies in having the correct perception..perhaps we can say to ourselves that okay my life isnot perfect..i dont have everything that i want or need..i am not very happy with the way things have happened..but the fact remains that my life is what i make it out to be..if i constantly curse myself or feel sad & depressed iwill not do myself any good..if i dont make myself feel good nobody else will..if i dont lift my spirit up, nobody else will..therefore i have to assume the responsibility of taking care of myself..

Perhaps these are just words..but sometimes just few philosophical words can help us think better..think positive and more importantly feel better..

Its our life after all..if we can just make an honest effort to live it in a better way, it will become better..now the way to live a better life could be different for different people..for some, it could mean spending more time with family..for others it could mean pursuing things which they have lost touch with..for others it could just mean having a better attitude..but at the end of the day if our efforts could be directed at living life in a better way rather than just spending our energies on all the things that have gone wrong, then perhaps life would not be too difficult

Expectation - The dreaded word

Here i m with my second post..thought that it will be at least sometime before i wrote my next post! but that wasnt to be!

Today as i sit to write this, i have one overwhelming thought in my mind..a thought which has many a times made me introspect a lot..it is the always debated topic of having expectations from others..from ur colleagues, friends, special people in ur lives, parents, siblings etc..how realistic it is to have expectations from others? how does it matter whether u have expectations or not? coz people would behave the way they want to..and not the way they ought to or the way u want them to

Many a times i have felt disappointed at being let down by others..when i have expected them to say or do something which they havnt..as dad always very rightly says that u must keep ur expectations from people at a very minimal level coz its u who would be hurt at not seeing them get fulfilled..

But my point is that if we donot expect from our loved ones, whom do we expect from? We certainly donot expect from strangers..we certainly do not look forward to being cared for & looked after,by people whom we dont know..its quite natural to expect our near & dear ones to do things or to show a certain kind of behaiviour coz its they who matter to us..

When we form relationships we want a fair give and take..its not always possible to keep giving & not getting anything in return..i m not talking of material possessions here..i m talking of a give and take in terms of our feelings and our care for the others..When we love someone, we want to be loved..when we care about someone we want to be cared for..when we do small things for others we want the same to be done by others..

Perhaps all of this is not realy ideal in today's world where people have everything except time..almost everyone, whether a relative or a friend, would always be heard complaining that they dont have time..they are not lying..the truth is that it is getting increasingly difficult to find time to do things for our loved ones

However there are certain things in life for which i think one can always find time for..though it may not be enough still there is always that little window that we can open to reach out to others..wishing a friend on his/her birthday..taking out time to talk to them..being patient enough to hear them out & show concern..surely its not much to ask for i guess!

Its often said that expectations are never fulfilled totaly..if u fulfill one, there wud be countless others that wud still be unfulfilled..if u make one person happy, there could be a lot of people who could not be pacified..such is the way of the world that u can never keep everyone happy..

But at the end what remains is the fact that its perfectly human to want people around us to make us feel good..to make us feel special..its very easy to say that lets just enjoy life without any expectations from anyone whomsoever..but the truth is that life seems to be much better when u know that there is someone who will make u happy..when u know that there is someone from whom u can expect something & most of the times, if not always, have those expectations fulfilled

I think its a never ending debate as to how much one should expect from others..though one should not let the disappointment of not having the expectations fulfilled, affect oneself adversely..

So to sum it up, have expectations from people because its only human to expect..do things for others without thinking of how well it will be taken or how much it will be acknowledged..and let it be known to the special people in ur lives, the fact that since they are special they ought to do things to maintain their status of being special!

My First

So here i go..my first post on my blog ever! as is the case with books where a preface is provided on the first page, i guess i too ought to hav a preface to my blog posts..more than any thing, it was the deep felt need to express..the need to write..the need to share..the need to just let it out, which made me get started with it..and as i hav always been told how much or how well i can express myself, writing a blog wasnt realy too far away from my to do list

When one pens down his/her thoughts, does one realise how one thinks and forms opinions..its perhaps the best way to know one's thought process..

Perhaps for a loner like me, its the best medium to express myself..in this world of a never ending rat race, where u hardly have enough ears to hear u out, enough shoulders to cry on; writing is the best way to just let the emotions come out

The title of this blog has been kept Truly Madly Deeply..the three words that i can relate to immensely..in due course of time, mite feel the need to change it..though it doesnt seem to a bad one to start off with

Finaly this post is dedicated to my dearest friend rekha who has actually been the inspiration behind this effort!